Trouble meeting women? … Try this fail-safe method that doesn’t involve you acting like a dick.
The Art of Point Blank Flirting
There are very few things in life that surprise me. but one that does is the inability of men to take risks, even on the smallest levels. I can’t tell you how many guys aren’t meeting women: They don’t even try. .. Even you, reading this article. … I’m willing to bet that recently, In a supermarket, on a bus, or in a restaurant, you saw a girl who was just so perfect – the exact look you like, the body you dream about. What did you do? ,,, It’s okay – I know what you did. It’s what you do every time. Nothing. She paid for her coffee and walked out, and you’ll never see her again.
Don’t feel bad. It’s happened to all of us. … Wait, I take that back. Feel terrible. You should feel terrible about it – as horrible as possible – because that’s the first step to stopping this pattern. Life is short, my friend, and youth Is even shorter. And you better forget about some mystical being or divine fate guiding you to your perfect soulmate. because It ain’t happenin’. Even if it did, is she really the right girl just because she was easy to meet? 1f you ran a company, would you want to interview 20 candidates for a job opening, or one?
What I’m about to tell you is going to make you a thousand times happier, remove a lot of the pressure from the situation, and, most importantly as a flirt professional, help you meet women with a fail-safe method. And this is not The Game: I understand that the concept of how to approach women has been beaten to death, with Neil Straus s’s best-selling book and VH1’s “The Pick-up Artist’’ leading the way. Strauss certainly offers some effective tips if you’re looking to bang as many women as possible being someone you’re not. I have no problem with this. We all have that sex demon lurking within us that, let’s face It, needs to be fed. It’s a need that, sometimes, we must satisfy with a little “looking the other way” of our own conscience.
This isn’t about that. This is about a straight, courageous, and real effort to meet women. Unless you look like George Clooney, they’re not going to approach you – you need to make the leap and bear all of the risk. Though, really, risk Is not the right word, since, In the grand scheme of things, this is peanuts and doesn’t involve much risk at all. It’s really something only a complete pussy couldn’t handle. So you can handle it, right?
Okay, here we go.
Flirting Method and Mind-Set
The method itself is simple: You see someone you like; you don’t see a ring; you go in. (Bear in mind I’m not talking about a bar. All bets are off in a bar, because alcohol greases the skids. and hooking up is an implied agenda for the evening. I’m talking about a cold-call in ordinary, everyday life.) Guys talk a big game, especially amongst themselves, but do you realize how few of them have the nerve to take this simple step? That means that you have almost no competition from the opening gun.
Much of a man’s attraction revolves around his power and confidence. What’s more powerful and confident than fearlessly approaching a woman in public and laughing in the face of a potentially embarrassing rejection? But how about I eliminate any potential for error and all risk of embarrassment (for you or her)?
What Do I Say When Flirting?
Before we get to that, there’s one essential piece of equipment you must have: a business card with your contact information. You must have it on you at all times. One sure thing is that when you run into that little hottIe of your dreams, it’ll be in some strange place you never expected. You must always be ready to kick into gear. A little five-cent card will say that you’re a person with a respectable life and not someone who’s going to dress up like his mother and stab her in the shower.
Second thing to keep in mind: leave no room to fuck up.
Let’s just set up the typical situation you’ll be facing. It’s going to be a public place and a single girl alone. I mention this because approaching a large group (containing the girl) Is an advanced move; if you’re still reading this, you’re probably not ready for it. The Flirting 401 “Point Blank” is most effective in a one-on-one scenario. So Iet’s use the coffee shop as an example. Thanks to a certain company that rhymes with Harbucks, coffee shops are everywhere and often populated with attractive women. But the technique can work in just about any public place.
Okay, so you walk into the coffee shop and see a girl who is definitely your type. Take a moment to assess how you look. If you’re well below your comfort level and look awful, then maybe-ah, fuck it. Go in anyway. You’re never going to see her again, trust me. As you walk over, use every molecule in your body to radiate calm, gentleness, and good faith. no matter how jacked up you may feel. Keep in mind that there’s a fine Iine between “cool dude with the stones to approach me” and “creepy weirdo.” Relax and do your best to come across like a regular dude – one who is gallant and romantic enough to make this against-the-odds move to win her attention, that is.
Once you’re near her, simply say, “Excuse me …” to get her attention. As she looks up, fade back just slightly so you don’t appear threatening – or bat-shit insane – and finish the line, “… are you single. by chance?”
That’s It?
Yep. Do it as naturally and matter-of-factly as you can, but that is it. Your work is 95 percent finished. You might be surprised. but for whatever reason, the body language of fading back combined with speaking in an open and welcoming way puts her at ease.
It’s all about the subtleties. It’s also about brevity. We’ve all attempted a lengthy and witty Iine that played out perfectly in our heads. but spun out of control when delivered, turning us into a stammering idiot. This way’s much more effective, trust me. Cuts right to the chase, but in a non-threatening way.
Point Blank flirting communicates everything in one easily delivered line. Unless you’ve been snacking on paint chips, you should be able to get it out.
It’s also a helluva lot better than the all-too-common, yellow-bellied technique of making ambiguous small talk, leaving the girl with the option of believing that she’s not being hit on. Something like, “Is that the half-and-half there?” usually ends with, “Yes, it is.”
After that type of exchange, the guy feels like he actually went for it. Luckily, he can go home and play with his own vagina.
“Are you single, by chance?” communicates everything in one easily delivered Iine. Unless you’ve been snacking on paint chips for the past year, you should be able to get it out clearly.
Now What? Flirting 201?
The human brain is quite the machine. Hers will instantly download a massive amount of information about you Just by the way you look, dress, move, and enunciate your words. You Just have to let it happen. Sit back for a split second. and wait for your answer. If she finds you attractive and you pulled off the approach properly, she will say something like, “I am, actually.”
Sold.
Now watch your air speed and ease up on the controls. Introduce yourself. Say you’re on your way to meet friends, but does she have a card, or can you get her number and maybe get together for a drink? Make sure you ask this. It’s polite and she will definitely say yes. I stress the importance of getting the contact information and leaving. Your work is finished. You will be seeing her again.
In sales, it’s important to know when to shut up. You just sold it. Don’t buy it back. Go have a great night and feel good about your future date.
What if the Answer is No?
This is the beauty part of the Point Blank flirting system. It eliminates potential embarrassment for both of you by giving her the option of saying she’s not single. She’s not saying she wouldn’t; she’s saying she can’t. If she says this, simply hand her your contact info and say, “A man can hope. Can I give you this anyway., just in case?”
She will take it. And there is still a chance she’s going to contact you at some point for several reasons. One, she could have just said that she wasn’t single reflexively, because she was thrown off guard by being Pont Blanked. Like I said, not many other men are doing it, so few women are prepared for it. But once she’s had some time to think about it, who knows? She might call the next day. Two, she really may have a boyfriend. Even then, you still might get a call from her at some point. Either they break up, or it’s on the rocks, or she’s a cheater. or whatever. Just give her the card. Move on, and hope for the best.
Flirting Life is All About Timing
When timing your approach for the Point Blank, make sure you leave yourself an out – meaning don’t make your move until after you’ve got your coffee. The last thing you want is to execute this and then have to stand with her, waiting for what will now seem like an eternity for your double latte. I’ve done this, and it’d brutal – especially if she’s not interested at all and there’s a small audience of fellow customers watching you marinate in your moment of failure. Be sure to time it for a graceful exit.
Flirting Upside > Downside
In addition to the beautiful simplic1ty of Point Blank flirting, there’s the negligible downside. What’s the worst that can happen? She says she’s not single? It’s not even a direct rejection. That’s the worst. And the best? Well, remember, it’s a lonely world out there, and people are looking for love. Attack this situation guilt-free, knowing that you’re contributing to one of the few enjoyable things we have in this world, meeting someone who gives you that amazing feeling of infatuation and passion.
Don’t Sweat It, and Don’t Regret It
I wouldn’t have written this if I hadn’t benefited from the technique immensely and watched my friends benefit from it. Keep in mind that it’s a numbers game. The more you put into it, the more you’ll get out of it. And remember, he who hesitates is lost. … You’ll never see her again, so take your shot.
Russ Meneve is a stand-up comic from New York City. He has appeared on The Tomght Show with Jay Leno, Late Night with Conan 0’Brien, and Last Call with Carson Daly. … These days, tracking down Russ can be a little tricky. As of this writing, his personal site seems to be down, although we did find a dandy transcript of a podcast from just a couple of years ago. Could be he’s a little busy to be bothering with things like his online presence. We understand people like that. We also admire them.
