Pop Shots Nikko Hurtado

Posted on by Team Penthouse

Pop Shots Title, Nikko Hurtado

The Penthouse World According to Nikko Hurtado

Later, after working construction for three years, Hurtado visited a buddy who was working as a tattoo artist and accepted an apprenticeship. Just a year after that, a client entered a Batman color portrait Hurtado had done in the Pomona Tattoo Portrait Contest and it won first place. The image went viral in the tattoo community (we’re talking pre-Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram), and Hurtado’s rep was made. Hurtado has tattooed plenty of celebrities — from Drake, Fred Durst, Brandon Boyd, and Andrew W.K. to Jenna Jameson, Jesse James, and Kat Von D — and appeared on LA Ink, Tattoo Wars, Tori & Dean, and Ink Master. Since 2009, he’s been working out of his own Black Anchor Collective tattoo studio, and now he’s expanded that brand, with its ubiquitous black anchor — a nod to the classic tattoo image — into a product line. But he pours himself into his oil paintings, many of which can be seen in these photos, and last year he had his first solo show. This is a man who understands beauty, style, and the creative spirit; who captures images on canvas and on skin that transform blank slates into gorgeous expressions of self… and now he’s done it in photographs.

Well, I guess we should just jump right into it. You get a call from Penthouse giving you license to produce a shoot based entirely on what you think makes a girl hot. Where do you even start?

I’ve been tattooing for 13 years, and through tattooing I started painting, because that was the evolution of me growing as an artist — trying to do more and learn more. My favorite period to paint is Baroque, so I figured,Why not do a take on the paintings I’ve seen from the past? I know that this is all about what I feel is sexy. I think that a woman’s figure is sexy and that art is sexy. When I see beautiful paintings of beautiful women… to me, that’s just it.

What exactly were you going for when you chose the model, Tiger Kaufman?

I was looking for someone who was natural and pretty normal. I wasn’t looking for someone who was super fit or who’d had a lot of plastic surgery. I just wanted someone with a nice physique, curvy, and just a more average kind of woman. I like that. I like a woman who has a normal body. I’m not into the whole, you know, “adjustments.”

And what was it about her that jumped out at you?

She was soft. I look at a lot of old paintings, and you can see the women in the paintings are more curvy rather than skinny. She reminded me of someone who would have been painted back then. I like all types of women: big, tall, small — I see beauty in all of it. But I wanted to show what inspires me. That is my fantasy woman.

It surprised me that Nikko Hurtado picked a girl who didn’t have tattoos.

I hate to see bad tattoos on beautiful women. I feel bad, like they did themselves an injustice. I love women with tattoos. But a lot of women who are heavily tattooed don’t have the best tattoos, and it’s just unfortunate. Beautiful women tend to get most of their tattoos for free, and free tattoos don’t always turn out to be the best tattoos. The sexiest thing for me as a tattooer is to have a blank canvas: someone who would allow me to do something beautiful on them and take a large space that is uninterrupted. I think that’s why someone with no tattoos is my ideal.

Does that tie in to why your pictures are more suggestive than explicit? It’s more about what’s not there versus what is there?

I like not knowing everything. For me, it’s the hunt more than the kill. I think it’s sexy to not get it all. It’s the glimpses of a woman that drive me wild. When it’s too easy, I just don’t enjoy it. I need a little bit of a chase.

It’s got to be impossible to experience a “chase” when you spend the day telling a hot girl what to do and how to do it.

She was very modest. Every time we stopped shooting, she would get dressed. To me, that’s awesome. To me, that’s sexy. She was proud to be naked — she was proud of her body and proud of herself — but at the same time, she had a little modesty, so it was good.

So there was more to it than just a fantasy model and an inspiring backdrop?

I really need an intelligent person. That’s the most important thing. I spend time with people every day. I tattoo a lot of women who are beautiful. But sometimes I think, You’re so beautiful, but I can never spend time with you because there’s no substance. I like substance. I like conversation.

Do you have a favorite body part that you were trying to highlight?

What’s weird is that during the photo shoot I realized that I like necks. I like a slender neck. Weird, right?

Um…

I like the whole body, of course. I like the hips. But there’s something about the neck… the neck and shoulders. I don’t know. I have no idea.

Is that your favorite body part to tattoo?

Not at all. Tattooing is different. I want the easiest body part: the arm or the leg. Something simple.

Pop Shots is an interesting exercise because it forces you to think about the things that you normally feel but don’t analyze. Was there anything about this process that surprised you?

I’m on a constant discovery. As an artist, I have to be honest with myself. Trying to find out who I am is the process of the rest of my life, so I am trying to be really in touch with my emotions and my feelings. I’m trying to not shy away from those things. The thing I learned the most from this process is being able to step away. Watching the photographer do her work, it was really inspiring.

How does the finished product stack up to the “Nikko Hurtado” vision in your head?

I think that, like everyone, I have a dark and a light side. I think that the pictures have the balance of light and dark in them and feel more like me because I have both. The contrast in the photos is what I wanted because I feel that I need a full range to represent me.

Do you have a favorite photo?

There was one photo in particular with her lying down as if I was going to draw her. To have a woman who’s lying there, and hopefully articulate and intelligent — you can just sit there and spend hours painting her. That picture reminds me of an old painting. And it sparks up a lot of different ideas and emotions. When I go to a museum, I sometimes feel overwhelmed with the level of the artist’s ability, but I’m also overwhelmed with the amount of sadness that I feel, because these people most likely died without accomplishing everything they wanted to as an artist. They were on such a chase. I feel the same thing when I look at [photos like these, although some with fewer clothes].

How so?

There are so many emotions that come up: You’re self-destructive, and stuff like that. Putting too much pressure on yourself. You’re looking at the picture from where I’m sitting. I’m giving people a window into what I see and what I do on a regular basis. With this photo, it has my paintings in the background. This photo is just one story, one day in our lives: the story of our photo shoot. But all of these individual pieces in the background have their own story, and each represents a different time in my life. This one photo encompasses more of me than one single piece of my artwork because it’s a collection of so many of my stories.

Could that be another reason why the Nikko Hurtado creative choices for Pop Shots were such a departure from who you’re perceived to be as a tattooer? You wanted to share a deeper story?

First and foremost, I’m a tattooer. That’s what I am. It’s my heart and soul, and I’m grateful for everything tattooing has brought me. But what I need right now is to paint. I’ve been working so much lately and have been pulled in a lot of different directions. I put a lot of pressure on myself, but that’s because of how my tattoos affect others. I tattoo for you. I do my work for you. Tattooing is as honest and as truthful as it gets. If you put a line down and it’s wrong, people will know it … or the tattooer will know it. If you blow it out and mess up a tattoo, you can’t change it.

But painting…

But painting is for me. It’s a release.

How does a photo shoot stack up against painting? Was this a release for you, or was it just more pressure?

The photo shoot was a release for me. It’s a whole different avenue, and a way to express myself to a large audience. Anything that can help me put my soul into something, something I can look at, that’s what makes me happy.

If you like tattoos, we have some fun — and beautifully illustrated — thoughts right here, but should you be more specifically interested in Nikko Hurtado now, we have some suggestions. As befits the modern artist, Nikko has a YouTube Channel which will tell you even more about him. There is a web site, complete with tour dates, if you can wrap your head around that. (It makes sense that tattoo artists would have conventions just like everyone else, but we never really thought about attending one. Now, however, we have. Sounds awesome. … If you happen to be around, look for us in Penthouse Shirts at the Convention Center.)

Z Mark the Spot(s)

Posted on by Team Penthouse

Historical Clarification: NOT the Z Marks Currently Found in Ukraine

Z Mark – Auto: The all-new 2023 Nissan Z

Nissan’s seventh-generation Z is an iconic sports car reborn for the modern age. Updated for the first time in a decade, the 2023 Z’s sleek design harkens back to its vintage roots and offers affordable luxury with a price starting at $40,000.

“Z is the pure expression of thrill,” says Ashwani Gupta, Nissan’s chief operating officer. “The new Z retains its authenticity as a pure sports car to keep you connected to the road, while bringing in the latest modern technologies to make sure the car can help keep you connected to your life.”

In short, this is a dynamic car built for enthusiasts, by enthusiasts. We’re talking a 3.0-liter V6 twin turbo engine to bump up power output over the previous generation 370Z. Its engine is rated at 400 horsepower at 6,400 rpm and 350lb-ft of torque starting from 1,600 to 5,200 rpm. And, of course, you may choose a six-speed manual transmission, including an EXEDY high-performance clutch, or opt for the quick-response nine-speed automatic transmission. The engine is designed to deliver a sharp, yet smooth response to the driver’s input to create a truly thrilling experience.

The 2023 Z’s 8.0-inch display audio touchscreen features six speakers and includes Apple CarPlay and Android Auto, as well as a hands-free text messaging assistant to keep you in the loop when you’re on the go.

From a design perspective, the long hood, large headlights and racy roof line are fundamentally Z. But it’s achieved a fresh reinvention by melding tradition with the best modern technology.
The new Z is slated to arrive soon at Nissan dealers across the country.

“Whether on an unexplored winding road or your daily commute, the Z brings a smile and awakens the senses,” says Gupta.

Obviously the winning romantic combination does not rely entirely upon an automobile, but we can say that the right choice her can certainly help you get onto the right road.

Z Mark – Fashion: Model Behavior

Jeff GoldblumFor years, models of a certain size and shape have been the ones given the luxury of gracing the world’s most regarded catwalks. Many of them have become household names, but the focus has always been about what they are wearing rather than who they are. Slowly but surely, however, fashion houses are becoming more and more familiar with throwing their latest creations on a celebrity to give their designs an added marketing boost — especially in a world that has become obsessed with making a quick impression. But is that really a bad thing?

Prada recently made a rather shrewd move to promote their Fall/Winter 2022/23 collections by calling in A-listers to give their latest threads some Hollywood star power, while highlighting a few key age demographics along the way.

The major names showing off their classic and chic collections included Jeff Goldblum, 69, Kyle MacLachlan, 63, Thomas Brodie-Sangster, 31, and Asa Butterfield, 25.

Random? Maybe not. Not only are these gents incredibly stylish in their own right, but they are all renowned for starring in popular yet incredibly cool roles — for even cooler directors. It was a way of Prada saying “this is where we sit artistically” on the modern cultural platform. There are many purists — and general skeptics — who see this type of move as a distraction from the garments being presented. And in this sense, a purist may be right. But guys like things to be relatable, and often buff and beautiful boys strutting up and down the catwalk doesn’t always push their buttons. However, give a man a brand that nods to David Lynch, Wes Anderson and Sex Education in one swoop, and discerning dudes will take note!

Prada isn’t new to using film as a vehicle for its brand and collections. Back in 2013, the aforementioned Anderson created a clever short film called Castello Cavalcanti. Bearing in mind the film world was crying out for new material from the director at the time, and Prada was behind the production, it was a huge score for the brand in the eyes of many — and original in its delivery. The Italian house has since continued its association with the American director by getting him to design the interiors of a café they created in Milan, so we shouldn’t be surprised by their latest choice of models.

These days, it’s harder to grab attention when it comes to new designs, and that means fashion houses have to get more creative to stay relevant. And an excuse to get more creative should never be frowned upon. But the good thing about these collaborations between the fashion world and Hollywood is that they’re few and far between, and are often used to promote the safer spectrum of their output.

God forbid we see Vin Diesel trudging down the catwalk in a Jean Paul Gaultier frock! But then again, why not?! 

At this point, many of us will pretend that we understand that last sentence, and thus how shocking that might be. Then we will move smoothly along in our Z Mark quest. No harm. No foul. (But definitely a pattern.)

Z Mark – Party House: Project Sunrise

Project Sunrise YachtSearching for a super yacht to entertain your 20 closest friends? Look no further than Project Sunrise! [A Z Mark Extraordinaire, for the record.]

When money is no issue, clearly the latest sleek concept from multi-award winner Robert Curtò Design should fit the bill — the spectacular gigayacht Project Sunrise.

This new super yacht offers a plethora of open deck spaces on the low superstructure, specifically designed for decreased wind resistance, and a wave-piercing hull to reduce drag. We’re talking 135m set to be prowling the seas at up to 24 knots.

On board, deck space has been optimized to use her 19m beam and 135m of length to create an idyllic island resort vibe with a walking path flowing from deck to deck around the yacht. Inside, you’ll find the interior filled with light flowing in from large windows, structural glass and a Japanese-inspired style with touches such as slatted screens and a water-drop statue using the kintsugi technique coming from a hole on the deck above to behind the bar table on the main deck.

Project Sunrise features a helipad, huge tender garage, astronomical observatory and not one pool but two. There’s also a private gym, an office, an additional gym for guests, a movie theater and two dining rooms. You know, just so you can mix it up. And for those who love water sports, the bow also features a drive-in jet ski bay. 

We will dutifully provide a handy-dandy path to get to more super yachts, should you so desire, although that may not be on the Christmas list for many of us this year. We understand what “money is no issue” says in the English language. We must be honest, though, and admit that we are not at all sure what it means. … More to our budget at least, we thus have added a grand addendum (because diminutive addendums seem silly). Consequently, we give you…

Z Mark - Mai Tai Cocktail

Z Mark – Booze!

Z Mark - Big O RecipeLet us introduce you to one of the new party favorites around here: Big O liqueur. Now we get a lot of people wanting to send us free stuff in hopes we might talk about them with our readers — and let’s be honest, viewers. We almost never follow through, though, because we have this really silly standard about only promoting things we actually like a lot, and as in the case of something like this new ginger wonderland, we actually know personally.

As you might imagine, we generally have very little trouble getting volunteers to try a new alcoholic concoction, y’know, for scientific purposes. What we have never seen before Big O, however, was a situation where every person that took home their test sample just decided to keep the bottle instead of bringing it back so the next person could try it. We had to buy three more bottles at retail just to get enough “tests” complete for us to feel confident. If nothing else, that one fact should tell you enough, so we will not bother with comments of captivating “almost” sweetness with a warm ginger aftertaste. (We preferred room temperature to chilled, but you should test for yourself.)

What we shall do instead will be tell you what the “lead scientist” on task discovered. To replicate these results — again, in honor of the pure scientific method

Big O naturally has a web site. More importantly, though, Big O has recipes on that web site. We love that. The picture we put together at the side here represents the most popular recipe at this one particular party, but we put together a few of these suggestions, and every option just seemed to add a little verve to otherwise standard fare. Understand we have no little experience around here with evening concoctions, and Big O was a Big Hit with us.

As a bonus, it has a beautiful bottle — and looks count at Penthouse — so it will look awesome on your bar. Besides, how many times will you be able to say this with plausible deniability: “So, can I give you a Big O by any chance?”

In Search of the Heretofore Elusive Big O

Apparently the copywriter got all excited about the new liqueur and forgot to actual put in the Z Marks link. We can do that, though. Makes sense that we would approve of this one, if you think about it. We tend to be fans of things that involve variations on lick.

Veteran Surf

Posted on by Team Penthouse

SEA CHANGE: Hope for the Veteran Surf

The spring after I got home from Iraq, I lay on a surfboard for the first time. Some fellow lieutenants and I had signed up for a group lesson for a friend’s birthday. All I remember of that misty day in Carlsbad, Calif., is plunging into the ocean and getting my sinuses clogged with seawater. I didn’t stand up even once. But my comrades and I were a stubborn lot, and several of us kept at it, making surfing — or more accurately, attempted surfing — a Saturday-morning ritual for much of the following year.

I’d lock my glasses in my car — a risky move since I’m extremely nearsighted and hadn’t yet been fitted for contacts — and stumble barefoot onto the sand. A foam beginner’s longboard formed a giant sail as I carried it down the beach. I’d battle the waves past the break. When I turned toward the shore and looked over my shoulder, I wasn’t able to discern sky from ocean. My friends would yell when a big wave came, and I’d only start paddling when they did. After an hour or two of flailing, we’d all get brunch at a beach-town café.

I didn’t stand up that whole first year. I drank a bunch, though, had nightmares about Iraq, and pined for a guy I’d met on deployment who wouldn’t, for very good reasons, make a go of things with me. I left the Marines and California for grad school in New York City, and I continued to try — and fail — to outrun my past.

If I wasn’t wounded or killed, did I really do enough in the desert? Was I worthy of the sacrifices others made? After several years of deep struggle, I started the long process of making peace with my deployment and my service as a whole. Part of that peace came the summer after grad school ended, when I picked up surfing again.

With a small crew of friends, I’d take the Long Island Railroad to Long Beach or the subway out to Far Rockaway at what felt like an ungodly hour on weekend mornings. My friends tried to coach me — all of us on rented boards. But despite actually being able to see the waves at that point, I almost never got the timing right. I typically found myself too far behind the crest to really ride it — and too timid to let myself be overtaken enough for it to push me. When I did, I might have made it onto my knees or butt. The rush of the ocean — a thrill for some — felt terrifying to me. Occasionally, I’d get brave and end up too far ahead of a wave, nosediving into the water, toppling ass over teakettle and filling my nostrils with seawater. In between wipeouts, floating on a board past the break washed away the hectic rush of the city, and I relaxed in anticipation of a post-surf burrito and nap. It might have been the contact lenses, but after a surf session, I felt I could see my demons more clearly. 

It is just this sort of peacemaking that drives Operation Surf — operationsurf.org — a Santa Cruz, Calif., nonprofit run by former pro surfer Van Curaza, who has devoted this portion of his career to teaching veterans surfing. The Netflix documentary Resurface tells the story of Operation Surf through the eyes of veterans like Bobby Lane, a Marine who sustained a traumatic brain injury in Iraq and whose post-deployment life spiraled into cabinets full of medication and a troubled young marriage. Lane had wanted to surf since he was a kid and planned to try Operation Surf just once — and kill himself thereafter. But something clicked after he caught his first wave. Now he says, “The ocean is the one place I know I can go to for peace.” He explains helping other veterans find the same solace he did gives him a sense of purpose and reduces his PTSD symptoms.

According to marine biologist Dr. Wallace J. Nichols, author of Blue Mind, an experience like surfing provides “a huge surge of dopamine. It’s a huge natural high.” Nichols, whose book explores how water positively affects health and well-being, adds, “Your body is a pharmacy.”

And if one is nursing severe physical injuries, reentry into civilian life can be especially challenging. Operation Surf’s adaptive programs have helped Martin Pollock, a triple amputee and British Army veteran, change his personal narrative from one of damage to one of resilience and strength.

For anyone struggling with the aftereffects of trauma, moving one’s body helps create new neural pathways for recovery. Or as Lane puts it, “Van just tells me to get out of my head because that’s a bad place to be.”

I agree wholeheartedly about the healing, head-clearing properties of ocean therapy. In summer 2020, fresh off a breakup and an interstate move, I picked up surfing again at a beach in Gloucester, Mass. A local surf shop’s Sunday-night lessons were one of the few socially distant, but still social, activities available to someone new in town in the midst of a global pandemic. Week after week, those surf nights broke the monotony of COVID-era isolation. Under the patient coaching of instructors, I started standing up consistently, and sitting out past the break on a board provided enormous peace. With colleagues and neighbors, I’ve gotten into a steady rhythm of surfing in New England, and even bought my own board this past spring. No longer am I trying to exorcise demons from the desert. Though there is sand in both places, the similarity ends at the waterline.

Driving home pleasantly tired after a surf session, knowing the war is safely in the past, I look forward to the same thing as Lane when he says, “I close my eyes to go to sleep, and the only thing I can dream about is catching that next wave.” 

Teresa Fazio is a former Marine. You can now find her book Fidelis on Kindle and in paperback.

Cannabis Hitch

Posted on by Team Penthouse

Nice Day for a Weed Wedding

As recreational cannabis becomes legal in more locales and the stigmas surrounding it diminish, weed is being welcomed into more places than ever before — including weddings.

Cannabis Hitch CakeInstead of cannabis lovers bringing weed to their wedding, Las Vegas Cannabis Weddings brings their wedding to the weed. The company allows loved-up couples the chance to say “I doobie” and celebrate their love of cannabis — and each other — by having their nuptials or renewing their vows inside some of Las Vegas’ best marijuana hotspots, including Planet 13, the world’s largest dispensary.

Las Vegas Cannabis Weddings was established in early 2022 by Maxine Fensom, an international entrepreneur, adult industry trailblazer, cannabis coordinator and newly ordained marijuana minister, who says she got the idea to create the business while taking people on tours of dispensaries.

“I founded Las Vegas Cannabis Tours first in 2020, which is one of the only marijuana tours in Las Vegas fully owned and operated by a female. The tours attract both locals and visitors, taking them on a journey to visit major dispensaries, cannabis museums and grow houses in Las Vegas,” she tells Penthouse.

“While running my tours, many people would ask me where they could get married with a cannabis theme. At the time, I didn’t have an answer for them, but I’ve always had a knack for providing unparalleled experiences, so I started thinking about how I could offer couples a cannabis-themed wedding and then in 2022, Las Vegas Cannabis Weddings was born.”

Just like there are endless strains of cannabis and ways to appreciate the herb, Maxine says there are a variety of reasons why some people choose rips over sips when it comes to their big day.

“All kinds of people are opting for a weed wedding! I especially marry a lot of couples who have found relief from either a debilitating illness or an addiction through cannabis and want to display their appreciation for the herb by incorporating it into their wedding or vow renewal,” she says.

“I’ve had many couples renew their vows with Las Vegas Cannabis Weddings. Most couples tell me they found the idea of a cannabis-themed wedding so novel and intriguing they decided to have another wedding. Some couples reveal cannabis helped them through some tough times, so they wanted to pay homage to that by having a cannabis wedding.”

For others, a cannabis wedding also plays into a desire to limit expenses.

“Post-pandemic, many couples are opting for a smaller wedding ceremony for health and safety concerns and to keep costs down. Many couples have revealed to me they don’t want to start off their joint venture in debt, so a weed wedding is the perfect fun, interactive experience for them,” Maxine says.

While the cannabis industry is a progressive space, it’s still predominantly run by men, and Maxine says part of her mission is to connect with other women who want to be involved in the industry.

“I’m no stranger to male-dominated industries, and the cannabis industry is very much male-dominated. So, I do what I can to pave the way for the women who’ll follow in my footsteps, becoming an intricate part of the cannabis industry. I love to surround myself with fellow female powerhouses who understand the challenges of the industry and shatter those pesky glass ceilings, all while wearing four-inch heels!”

Las Vegas Cannabis Weddings has several packages on offer, as well as add-ons like a Bud Bar, Pot Party Favors — lighters, rolling papers and rolling trays — limo service, a cannabis bouquet and matching canna-boutonniere, cannabis-themed wedding thrones, and a stoner-worthy Munchies Menu, featuring lobster mac and cheese bites, bacon-wrapped shrimp, filet mignon and more.

Sounds lit if you ask us.

Cannabis Hitch Founder Maxine Fensom (Las Vegas Cannabis Weddings)

New Motto: Yes We Cannabis!

Should you have an interest in a “Cannabis Hitch” of your own, we encourage you to consider Las Vegas Cannabis Weddings for your adventure. Hey, newlyweds get all sorts of fun treats in Vegas, and at least you will not need to entertain your entire wedding party for the entire time. One can find an entire spectrum of diversionary options in that town. See a show. Have a fancy dinner. Go cast aspersions at the Raiders new head football coach. Have a blast.

World Cup Runneth Over

Posted on by Team Penthouse

The Most Controversial World Cup Ever

When the second World Cup took place in Italy in 1934, Uruguay boycotted the tournament. They were still annoyed that not enough European nations had come to their World Cup held four years earlier. No team has ever boycotted a World Cup since.

But if ever there was a World Cup to boycott, then this year’s would be it.

To say 2022’s event is already the most controversial World Cup of all time would not be that, well, controversial. Sepp Blatter and many other FIFA members have already gone on record as saying it was a mistake to give the World Cup to Qatar. But then backing up a truckload of cash to ease the voting may have helped.

Since then, there have been numerous reasons to walk away from that decision. Human rights organizations have condemned the working conditions of migrants who built the World Cup’s stadiums, as well as condemning general conditions for migrants in the nation. While only 37 workers have died in the construction of the stadiums, some 6,500 migrant workers have perished in the country since it won its bid for the World Cup in 2010. Wages are poor, and conditions are atrocious.

With homosexuality outlawed in Qatar, gays can be imprisoned for up to seven years, and there have even been instances of people being put to death. While soccer has been encouraging players to come out, the World Cup in Qatar will not be the place to do it.

Then, of course, there’s the fact that Qatar has never qualified for a World Cup in their own right, it’s so hot there the tournament was forced to move from June and July for the first time in its history, and fans can’t drink alcohol in the stadiums. That last bit finally got your attention, right?

The only thing that will really upset soccer fans, though, is if the tournament itself is a letdown.
The 1934 event was a celebration of fascism and the 1938 one a homage to Adolf Hitler. But the 2010 World Cup in South Africa irritated most fans because of the quality of the soccer, the mosquitoes and those annoying vuvuzela horns, while others were seriously put off by the 1994 tournament in the U.S. because the crowds and grounds didn’t quite feel right.

What soccer aficionados really want are great sports nations going head-to-head, on good pitches, in great stadiums, with knowledgeable fans. So for all the human rights issues and politics surrounding this World Cup, as long as the pitches are well watered, the heat is bearable and the stadiums are packed, then we’re on board.

A decent giant-killing early on and some cracking goals, and we’ll forget the rest. It shouldn’t be that way, but it really will be.

What might be the biggest problem for fans around the world watching on TV, though, is the time of year. English fans used to watching their team in short sleeves and sunshine will be confined to home and the pub through November into December. The same applies for most big soccer nations. However, in Australia — a nation used to getting up at 4 a.m. in freezing midwinter to watch games — the tournament will take place in beautiful summer heat. Reason enough to forget the controversies already. 

So far the World Cup has been anything but “a letdown” by most definitions. Granted, a few of the teams on the losing end of a surprise upset might disagree, but one cannot judge life by losers if for no other reason than bitter tastes icky. (And if you click that link you can see what news sites from around the world cover. We think that may be one of the best things about the web, but we may be odd. Others have opined as such.) All of that said, however, we could not resist the opportunity to make a simple statement with a single photograph of what the world might enjoy if they only put Penthouse Pets on the teams.

World Cup via Megan Mason & Alexus Winston

Granted the pure athletics might not be up to world-class athlete standards, but do you think people would really mind?

Sex Life Lessons

Posted on by Team Penthouse

Set Your Sex Life on Fire

You’ve no doubt got some premium moves when it comes to showing a woman a good time in bed. Hell, you might even have a reputation for being an orgasm donor. But no matter how skilled you are — or how satisfying your sex life may be — by adding a few new tricks to your bedside arsenal, you could be giving bigger, better and more intense orgasms to the ladies in your life.

We’re talking about the earth-shattering, thigh-quaking, claws-down-your-back, alarm-the-neighborhood, drench-the-mattress kinds of orgasms. You know the ones. … To help you reach these lofty goals, Penthouse has put together a few tips for upping your orgasm-giving game and taking your sex life to a whole new level of heat.

Slow Down!

Rule No. 1: If you want to get her worked up, you’ve got to slow down. We call it “sex life” for a reason. We don’t call it sex moments.

As tempting as it is to charge into a sexy situation like a bull in a vagina shop, if you want to give your play partner the kind of orgasms that will have her talking in tongues, then you need to take your time. After all, nothing is less of a turn-on — or dries a vagina quicker — than skipping the foreplay and zeroing in on penetration.

Start by setting a relaxing scene that’s conducive to a sexy time, turn on some titillating tunes and go for a slow and steady build. Take a concerted step to disconnect from the busy and distracting world and connect to each other. Then you can focus on nothing but being in the moment together.

The Sex Life journey begun.

Use Your Mouth

Put the “cum” in cummunicate, so to speak. Use your mouth — to talk to her.

Ask your date what turns her on. How does she like to be touched? What does she fantasize about when she touches herself? Figure out what gets her going and what she finds pleasurable. Encourage her to share. Then tell her you find it hot when she’s uninhibited.

Make sure she knows you are open-minded and won’t judge her. (And then do not judge her, fool.) Take her responses seriously and encourage her enthusiasm. Positive reinforcement will always be your friend in the sex life challenge.

By having these discussions — either before or during play — you’re not only going to learn what she wants and finds pleasurable. You’re also going to be building trust. Understand that “letting go” centers almost completely on trust. Simply put, being able to let go during sex plays a huge role in having more intense orgasms.

The Sex Life journey has turned the first corner.

Add Some Hardware

Sex toys serve as the ultimate wingmen when it comes to having better sex. Think about it: Some group of professionals put lot of time, money and expertise into designing them for a singular purpose — to administer pleasure. They only have one job, and most of them do this job exceptionally well, so don’t be shy. Put these professionals to work!

On a more specific, personal, level, sex toys come in many shapes, sizes, colors and types — for all sorts of uses. Many playthings have ergonomic design, meaning they’re specifically created to hit hotspots in the most pleasurable ways possible. Rather than serve as a substitution for sex, you can always use sex toys to get you in the mood. So bring a different “vibe” to the mix or stimulate multiple areas of the body at once.

You can use sex toys during partnered play without being dependent on them. If you’re not sure where to start — or you’re worried about being overshadowed by a rubber dong — try a vibrating cockring or a vibrator for couples, so you can increase intimacy and feel more connected.

The Sex Life has Rounded Third

Focus on HER

Nothing primes the body for more intense orgasms like skilled foreplay. If you want to give her the orgasm of all orgasms, put her pleasure front and center. And that means putting your own orgasm on the back burner, while you light her fire.

Make it your mission to make her feel as sexy as possible. Think of yourself as the world’s greatest explorer of climaxes and discover her erogenous zones. Constantly experiment and touch her with your hands and mouth in ways she’s never-before experienced. (But do remember to catalogue those favorites you discover.)

Bottom line — as it were — don’t hurry the penetration. You want to work all of her hotspots properly. You’ll know when you’ve reached her summit because she’ll be absolutely begging you to be inside her. Trust us: Passion and the suspense of all the joys to come (again, as it were) will always be the keys to inspiring the happiest of endings.

Sex Life Fulfilled

If you are the type of lover that only thinks about your own pleasure, then (A) skip all murkiness and heartache of relationships entirely. Go back to the “toys” idea we mentioned, and make your sex life purely personal. You’ll be doing everyone a favor. And (B), what are you doing here anyway? Shouldn’t you already be at the making a sandwich part? Make yourself a “hero” to all women and simply stay away from them.

Cannibalism Volgens de Nederlanders

Posted on by Team Penthouse

The Dutch Mob Who Tried Cannibalism

We are fortunate indeed, we who in the 21st century live in nations where politics are conducted in an orderly and well-mannered fashion. We consider, for a moment, cannibalism as a political statement.

Now, of course, there are many people in many countries who would argue with the suggestion that their political system is orderly, and millions who would take issue with well-mannered. But in historical terms, we live in a golden age of respectful public debate and electoral stability, as evidenced by the fact that it’s well over four centuries since the citizens of a major Western power killed and ate their national leader.

Yes, there is quite a story there, so we skip back to the 17th century, when the Netherlands was a powerful trading and seafaring nation — a far cry from the adorable flowery little spot with an economy entirely dependent on André Rieu DVDs that it is today.

These were the days of the flourishing Dutch Republic, a federation of the seven provinces of the Netherlands, the largest and most powerful of which was Holland. (Yes, Holland is only one part of the Netherlands, not the whole country. Amaze your friends by whipping out that bit of knowledge.) And the most powerful man in Holland — and therefore the most powerful in the whole republic — was the raadpensionaris, or Grand Pensionary, Johan de Witt.

De Witt was made pensionary in 1653 and helped guide the republic to increasing wealth and clout. But no powerful man is ever without enemies, and in de Witt’s case, they were some real doozies.

Opposed to de Witt — and the republican cause he spearheaded — was the House of Orange, the Dutch noble family that had ruled the Netherlands. But it was waning in power following the smallpox death of William II of Orange in 1650, two days after the birth of his namesake son.

De Witt’s republicans worked assiduously to keep the Oranges from accruing influence and make sure William III would grow up to serve the state rather than take control of it.

De Witt succeeded in ruling the republic for almost 20 years, but in 1672 things turned ugly. The Dutch still refer to 1672 as the Rampjaar or Disaster Year.

In this year, both England and France attacked the Dutch Republic, which — thanks to 20 years of focusing on its sea power — had a notably weak army. The English and French, being from more populous nations with lots of terribly mean soldiers, therefore easily stormed the country, and the people began to think maybe their Grand Pensionary wasn’t all he was cracked up to be.

The pro-royal Orangists, not worrying about how silly their name sounded, saw their chance and took it. On June 21, de Witt was wounded by a knife-wielding wannabe assassin. On Aug. 4, he resigned, hoping that might sate his enemies’ bloodlust. His hope was in vain.

Johan’s politician brother Cornelis was arrested on charges of treason, which were about as well-founded as 99 percent of treason charges throughout history, i.e. not at all. Cornelis was tortured and sentenced to exile, and his brother came to the jail in The Hague to help him start his trip far away from the Dutch Republic and the ingrates who’d screwed over them both.

As it happened, though, the Orangists weren’t satisfied with the sober judgment of the law. The Hague’s local militia attacked the de Witt brothers at the jail and shot them both. They then left them to the tender mercies of a frenzied Orangist mob that had gathered. Stripped naked and mutilated, the bodies were strung up in the public square, at which point the mob began to act in what might be called bad taste.

There in The Hague on Aug. 20, the Dutch people settled in for a feast. To be specific, they roasted and ate the livers of both Johan and Cornelis. Many historians believe this to be a low point in Dutch history, and certainly it’s true most people’s assessments of the Dutch national character tend not to include revolutionary cannibalism. Why they felt the need to devour the flesh of their erstwhile leaders cannot be said. Even in those brutal times, mobs tended to be satisfied with the desecration of corpses, without chowing down on them. One might simply surmise Johan had really pissed some people off.

The whole affair ended in the ascent of William III to power over the Dutch Republic, and thence to the throne of England, Ireland and Scotland. That was certainly a fortunate coincidence for him, since he had stayed out of the conflict entirely and had absolutely no part in inciting or aiding the agitators in any way, and anyone who says he did is a dirty liar. Still, he may have occasionally in later life felt a slight queasiness as he recalled the gourmet dinner which had precipitated his rise.

Well that certainly creates a gruesome twist on your basic liver paté for sure. Best we not in any way duplicate this effort, lest judgement fall down upon our collective pate, however. … You could take you mind completely away with a look into the entire lineage of the Crown in England. By the time you get to the bottom of that page, you might begin to feel better about American politics — as divisive and horrible as it can be. On the other hand, maybe not.

Fantasy Football Fan Antics

Posted on by Team Penthouse

She’s Got (Fantasy Football) Game

Sexy and savvy Lisa Ann is indisputably the reigning queen of fantasy football, but it’s a crown the lifelong sports fan has earned through nearly a decade of dedication and hard work. As pro athletes gear up for the gridiron and fantasy players eye their every move, Penthouse talked to expert analyst Lisa Ann about her journey from being one of the biggest names in adult entertainment to her rise to the top of the fantasy football heap — and how her latest career is her most fulfilling yet.

Lisa Ann has proven herself to be the mistress of reinvention. Her first stint as an on-camera talent in the adult industry ended in 1997. But nine years later, she came out of retirement to portray Republican vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin in a string of blockbuster porn parodies, which also sparked a MILF movie revolution.

By 2013, she switched gears to co-host the radio show Stripper Town, where fans would hoodwink call screeners to get on-air and steer the discussion from clubs to Monday Night Football to update her on the games. Her enthusiasm for the sport led to a SiriusXM opportunity — co-hosting a show about fantasy football.

For anyone unfamiliar with the wildly popular pastime, participants create hypothetical rosters from real athletes in the National Football League (NFL) and compete against the dream teams of others within a league to score points based on the performances of their players in real-life NFL games. While some fantasy participants scrimmage for cash prizes, others simply compete for bragging rights with their best buddies.

In the two months before Lisa Ann’s first sports broadcast, the longtime Dallas Cowboys fan gave herself a crash course in fantasy football, reading every book on the subject she could get her hands on and working up countless mock football drafts.

She recalls, “When I got my first one-year [fantasy football radio] contract, my best friend said to me, ‘You can either be a flash in the pan, or you can be so good at this they can’t fire you.’”
Her winning performance kicked off a seven-year stint at Sirius, where she helmed the hugely popular Lisa Ann Does Fantasy. She also competed in the Howard Stern Show’s Emotional Friends league, alongside then-ESPN personality Matthew Berry and War at Home actor Michael Rapaport. But she’s since branched out on her own, leaving Sirius during the pandemic to produce her own content on her social channels — including @thereallisaann on Instagram, where she breaks down the NFL’s divisions and gets into football’s nitty-gritty details with her 4.3 million followers.

 “I realized what a great tool social media and YouTube was,” she says. “I thought what if I did Sunday morning start/sits on my YouTube channel and just engaged in a live setting, helping people set their lineups and using my Instagram to do IG Live.”

Since 2015, she’s also engaged in what she’s dubbed Fantasy Football Fridays, where she connects with multiple radio shows from coast to coast — such as Saint Louis’ The Morning After STL (insideSTL.com) and Tampa’s Beckles & Recher on WDAE (953wdae.iheart.com/featured/beckles-recher) — to talk strategy with callers and take deep dives into local teams every week during the season.

When it comes to her own selections, Lisa Ann — who participates in up to 25 leagues annually — says her drafts are all about diversity, which helps her stay up to speed on the NFL’s many players and allows her to offer the most well-rounded advice as she interacts with her audience.

However, her work is more than just a job. She explains, “When I fell into fantasy football, which I call the game inside the game, I realized it was a passion for me.”

She says the sense of community fantasy football engenders and how it strengthens the bonds between friends old and new are some of its greatest joys. But she still works hard to keep her head in the game, devouring ever-evolving news from well before the start of training camp to the last second of the season.

“Starting in July, I up my fantasy football news to between two and four hours a day,” she shares. “By August, I make it five to seven hours a day. And then for the rest of the season, I listen to sports news from eight to 10 hours a day.”

She confides her passion for football fuels her soul and says it adds another facet to her conversations with fans from her porn past, allowing her to interact with them on a new level. But Lisa Ann’s one-woman media empire covers more than just fantasy sports. She keeps her finger on the pulse of popular culture with engaging interviews on her YouTube channel The Real Lisa Ann and podcast The Lisa Ann Experience and discusses dating conundrums and more with special guests — including many of today’s most popular porn stars — on her YouTube channel and podcast Dudes Do Better.

She’s also the author of two memoirs, The Life — which covers her journey in the adult industry — and the recently released The Life Back, which discusses her evolution through fantasy sports and how it put her on a new path.

Lisa Ann admits for the next few months, “Football will run my life — and I will love it!” But she reveals she’s also eager to grow her podcasts because “I love finding interesting conversations to be shared and meeting people.”

Though Lisa Ann no longer shoots scenes for the adult market, she maintains a connection with the industry by going to trade shows to greet fans and mentoring young stars. She also recently shot a groundbreaking sexual wellness campaign for condom brand Durex in Turkey with fellow porn legend Rocco Siffredi. But her leap from X-rated fare to mainstream fame marks one of the most successful career transitions of any adult entertainer.

Lisa Ann managed to avoid the pitfalls which have plagued so many of porn’s most dynamic performers and credits friends with keeping her grounded. The straight-shooting stunner also acknowledges she never allowed her adult career to become her whole identity.

“One of the reasons I was so happy to start Dudes Do Better and to talk to performers who are newer in the industry today is to kind of be a pace car for them,” she shares. “I think they look at me, and they’re like, ‘This is pretty cool. I think her life is OK. She did all of this, too. Let me get to know her. Let me figure out what she did to have this future afterwards.’”

“If I could do that for even just one person that would be the greatest part of my legacy … [To help them understand] if you do things right, your opportunities will be unlimited.” 

You can find Lisa Ann as her own web site, by the way. We cannot be sure how many fake Lisa Anns there might be out there, but they’ll have a tough time of it in either the fantasy football or adult film worlds. Because we can, we thought we’d throw in a little more illustration of a woman who also has game – albeit in a different kind of football in this case.

You can read more about Penthouse Pet Savannah Sixx in these very pages, actually. Fair warning, though: You may find yourself not thinking about fantasy football of any kind.

Festival Cheat Sheet

Posted on by Team Penthouse

Forgotten How to Festival?

At least, that’s how it was in the good old days of 2019, when life was more about shredding chords and less about shedding viruses.

You may have been to one of the U.S.’s rebooted overnight events already this year, but if you’re looking ahead to festivals with only a vague recollection of what to do, fear not. We’ve rustled up a refresher for you.

Tickets. Don’t forget these. Ditto wristbands and any other proof-of-purchase paraphernalia. There’s nothing worse than rocking up and realizing you’re that person. Your friends will laugh in the first couple of minutes. But they won’t after half an hour.

Camping gear. Have moths chewed fist-sized holes in your tent since your last outing? Have your poles rusted? At the festival, consider tying something — a small flag or undies — to your tent to make it stand out, the same way you would with a black suitcase when flying. It’s not impossible that someone will be happy when you mistakenly clamber into their tent at four in the morning whispering, “Hi honey, I’m home,” but the odds are against you.

If you’ve parked close to your tent and hear repeated hissing during the night, it might be that someone has slashed your tires, but it’s probably just a tent full of teens doing whippets. Best to nod along with closed eyes as if you’re familiar with all those new songs released during the COVID era, with lyrics like: “I used to respect her, but now she’s a vector.”

Take baby wipes — especially if you’re taking an actual baby. But even without one, those sweet, soggy rectangles can be the difference between festering in bile and festivaling in style.

Wash your hands after going to the toilet. When you’re done, wash them again. Then scrub the tap and the soap dispenser. Finish with a spritz of hand sanitizer. Then wash your hands again.

Don’t bother filming anything. You’ll never watch it, even if it’s just a three-second clip of what your mashed brain thought was the highlight of the whole weekend.

Festival fashion. This has changed since 2019. Or has it? Avoid the stress and wear the oldest clothes you have. People of the same vintage will think those bootcut jeans look cool. Anyone born after 2000 will think you’re making a statement and ask you to dance with them in their TikTok vids.

On-site first-aid and emergency numbers. Punch those digits into your phone or write them on your arm, but don’t injure yourself in the process. Even if you don’t need them, someone else might, in which case you’ll be a festival hero.

Enjoy!

Festival Reminder

Oddly enough, this “festival” concept reminded us of one of the very early CyberCuties in Penthouse Magazine (well, “very early” in this administration). She has one of the great names ever, Hopeless SoFrantic, and at least at the time she was living in a converted bus, traveling and … you guessed it … playing in festivals whenever she could. Not oddly at all, we then decided that we could definitely enhance this perhaps unnecessary advice.

See? Sometimes we’re simply brilliant. … PenthouseGold, should you wish to join, by the way. (Sometimes we also suck up.)

Pop Shots Luenell Campbell

Posted on by Team Penthouse

Pop Shots Luenell Campbell Title
The Penthouse World According to Luenell

The original bad girl of comedy, partnered up with photographer Andy Hartmark and models Ana Foxxx and Justine Joli to prove that you don’t need to spend a boatload of money to have a naughty-good time.

How does Luenell feel to be the first female to direct a Pop Shots feature?

I feel amazing about that.

Any apprehension from the famous Luenell?

Not for one second. Maybe if I wasn’t such a brash, open-type person who came through the seventies and had been with chicks before… and sort of a blue comic-type person. Maybe if I wasn’t all those things, it might have been awkward. I’m pretty open and fluid and loose and fun and uninhibited.

Did you already have an idea of what model types you were going for?

I was looking for who was different from the chicks I always see. I always see regular, WASP-y chicks I can’t relate to. I wanted some color and some diversity. Not a blonde; I wanted a redhead. I didn’t want a light-skinned black girl; I wanted a dark-chocolate black girl. I didn’t want just a fucking Blue Steel — looking guy. I wanted the romance-novel guy because that’s what women fantasize about. I was surprised that all the models you selected were fit. Originally I wanted a thicker girl, but I didn’t want any backlash. I didn’t want nobody to have any reason to go, “Ew! She’s too whatever.” You’ve got to be careful with that because there’s big, and then there’s thick. Thick is like Vanessa del Rio, you know. But then it can be too much in contrast to the other girl. When I looked at those two, they looked like they fit like puzzle pieces.

Any regrets about that decision?

I think all different body types are sexy. I had a whole bunch of different choices. I would have gone with a thicker girl, but they weren’t right for the shoot. People write a lot of shit under the guise of anonymity with the internet. What I did not want was any room for anyone to talk any shit.

How did you come up with the theme of the shoot?

I don’t know. I was possessed. I do a lot of red carpets, and all we ever do is walk down them. But it’s a beautiful red carpet. I remember back when Paris Hilton (or whoever it was) fell off her motorcycle onto the red carpet. That was the first time I ever saw anyone lying on one. And that made an impression. So I said, “I want a red carpet, but I don’t want them standing there like every other red carpet. I want them lying on the red carpet.” Somebody has got to have a fantasy of fucking on a red carpet.

Same with the kitchen?

Well, hell. I saw the The Postman Always Rings Twice. Every woman wants to be knocked the fuck down and screwed on the kitchen counter… and they had a great counter for that. That house was made from my fantasy. It was perfection. I didn’t have one awkward moment about how we were going to do this and how we were going to do that. Everything just fell into place like I was destined to do that.

What was it like being on the other side of the camera?

At first I had to loosen up a little bit. I didn’t want to come in there and just act like I knew what I was doing. I didn’t want to come in there trying to take over, like, “Bitch, I do this all the time,” because I don’t — it takes a village, you know. Luckily everybody had the same mind-set. I was able to have light moments with everyone. I just was so excited to be there.

Keeping everything light was a big factor for you.

Erotica, porn, whatever you want to call it, doesn’t have to be so serious. Like, I think the best threesomes that anybody ever has are when you’re really drunk, or on mescaline or mushrooms or something. You’re giggling and laughing and playing with each other at the same time. Not so dark and seedy and all that. You can get really good shots that way.

Did the finished product meet your expectations?

It surpassed my vision. When you put green grapes, and red strawberries, and a black girl, and a redheaded girl, and milky skin, and chocolate skin, and a tanned golden boy … when you put all of that together, you got this beautiful Crayola-crayon box of color. It’s not just about the poses and their asses and the tits. It’s about the color that gets you excited and the little pops that are there. I’m a real visual chick, and when [Penthouse] said, “What do you want to see?” this is the shit that I want to see. This is the stuff that I think ladies will take an interest in. They don’t want to have a chick tied up, hogtied, and dog collared. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Do you have a favorite picture?

My personal favorites are the kitchen and the pool. We had beautiful Alejandro carrying the woman out of the pool, and that’s so striking. Looks like a vampire about to bite. It was delicious, and it was a hot summer L.A. night in the mountains, and it just could not get any better. The girls frolicking as they were in the water… who don’t like that?

What was it about the kitchen that got you going?

It was simple. Any housewife can do what we did. Grapes, strawberries, whipped cream. These are not unattainable. These are attainable fantasies for under $10, or with an EBT card even. A lot of people don’t have a bondage swing in their bedroom, so that’s a fantasy that’s unattainable. But this stuff that we did is absolutely attainable in anybody’s normal life.

How did Justine and Ana make this fantasy work for you?

Both those girls had great legs, legs that were like scissors. With Red [Justine] being a formally trained dancer, she just had beautiful arches to her feet. They could point and do all that. And Ana had this long torso… the way she could just twist. It was very artistic to me. A person could have done the same thing with clay and shaped them like that.

What about the way you made them interact?

In interracial relationships, part of the erotica is seeing the mesh of the skin. Seeing the black leg over the white leg. The black hand over the white cock or breast. I don’t give a fuck what nobody says. There’s gotta be a lot of that.

Did you learn anything new?

I learned that medium to small breasts photograph so much better. The big breasts, if they’re real, they’re over here and they’re over there and they can flop around all awkward.

And what about Alejandro?

You were all over him, but kept him in the background most of the time. For selfish reasons. I thought the more the girls shot, the more I could fuck around with Alejandro. Keep them bitches busy so I can talk to him. Come on… In a woman’s mind, we really want a beautiful guy like that to just shut up, go over there, and just be beautiful. That’s really all I needed from him. Looking at it from a female point of view, men are always trying to take the fuck over, and I didn’t want that. I just wanted him to sort of float in and out fluidly through the shoot, and I think that’s exactly what happened.

Looking back, is there anything Luenell wishes she’d done differently?

You mean besides pulling Alejandro’s dick out and sucking it on that fuzzy rug beside the bed? It would have been great to drop a bunch of E and have everybody fuck each other at the end of the shoot. I’m not sure how to get this conversation back on the rails, Luenell.

Where do we go from here?

I just want to say that if anybody gets anything out of this interview, it should be, Don’t be afraid to live this life. You only get one. Don’t pass on opportunities because you’re nervous or scared or you’ve never done it before. You have more inner strength than you think. And you have more creativity than you think. You need to do things that feed your soul and feed your humor and feed your spirit — whether anybody agrees with it or not. You’ve really just got to live life, because we do not know the minute nor the hour the curtain may shut down on us.

That’s one of the more profoundly beautiful things I’ve ever heard.

It’s the fucking liquor, I’m sure!

As one might expect, you can find Luenell Campbell and her tour schedule on her site, and she’s definitely worth a follow on Instagram or Twitter (y’know if everyone has not given up on that by the time you read this). As for Alejandro, we sadly have no idea. If you run into Luenell, though, you can ask her. She might know. … And should you want to know how caught up in the shooting frenzy Luenell got, you might check out Hey Luenell in these very pages.

Penthouse Pop Shots Logo

Russell Repudiation

Posted on by Team Penthouse

David O. Russell Ignores the Haters

Featuring talents including Christian Bale, Margot Robbie, John David Washington, Rami Malek, Robert De Niro, Mike Myers, Taylor Swift and Chris Rock, it’s an amazing ensemble. Some have worked with the director before on films such as American Hustle, Silver Linings Playbook, Joy, The Fighter and Three Kings.

So far, so good. But the majority of news stories surrounding Russell’s first release in seven years suggest he’s a piece of shit. When I say news stories, I mean blogs and extended social media posts. But there are a lot of them, and many have swear words in their titles.

The main reason for the vitriol is that Russell has been on the verge of being canceled for a number of years, and there’s a groundswell of opinion on the internet insisting it’s time the agenda was pushed harder.

In 2011, Russell’s transgender niece, then 19, filed a complaint in Florida, claiming the Hollywood hotshot had sexually assaulted her. According to a police report, the moviemaker admitted he’d touched her breasts after claiming she’d allowed him to do so while they were doing ab exercises at the gym. He supposedly did so out of curiosity about her enhanced figure. The case was closed without any charges being brought against Russell.

Such a move was foolish to say the very least, especially for a director known for his genius/madness approach to filmmaking and his volatile emotions. He has clashed on set with Lily Tomlin and George Clooney among others. He’s also infamous for allegedly putting fellow director Christopher Nolan in a headlock at a Hollywood party.

Meanwhile, Russell has continued his work raising money and awareness for mental health advocacy, a cause close to his heart. He beautifully expressed his sentiments toward those dealing with mental illness struggles in Silver Linings Playbook, which is about a bipolar man returning to his family after spending time in a mental institution.

But seven years without making a movie, after creating four outstanding features in five years between 2010 and 2015, suggests a deeper behind-the-scenes story.

However, Amsterdam — a murder-mystery comedy set in the ’30s — is slated for release in November and has a slightly quirky Wes Anderson feel about it.

One of the news stories currently making the rounds asks a very valid question: Why are all these top actors choosing to work with Russell? And for reasons other than were intended, that’s probably a great question to examine. Bale and De Niro aren’t short of work and are great judges of character, and they’re happy to be involved. Swift and Robbie are strong women who aren’t afraid to voice their opinions, and they’re taking part. In the current environment, isn’t it telling these high-profile actors haven’t shunned Russell?

The cast is diverse, experienced, and intelligent, and many have worked with Russell before — and certainly worked with him after — the 2011 controversy. They know him well.

While disgruntled articles continue to swirl, it may be better to look at those closer to the story with no reason to defend Russell in particular — other than that they enjoy working with the creative genius.

How the film performs will be interesting, and how the mainstream media will treat it remains to be seen. I don’t know if Russell is a piece of shit, but those close to him seem to think he’s OK, so I’m looking forward to Amsterdam.

Around here, of course, we have the benefit of seeing how things turned out before we have to publish. (Digital beats the old-school ink-on-paper approach for many reasons, but this qualifies as a major one, certainly.) … As it turned out, Rolling Stone loved the show if for no other reason than the lengthy and stellar cast list. … Overall, they seem to be in the minority, though — although in fairness criticisms seem to focus almost singularly on the director, Russell, being apparently a truly horrible human being. We don’t need to go into any of that, however, as we can simply point out that Amsterdam made in the neighborhood of $10 million globally across its weekend debut, and it cost over $80 million to make.* It could be that potential audience members care more about the director’s character than do the actors being paid to hang around with him. Go figure.

Connector — One for All, and All for One

Posted on by Team Penthouse

Connector Regulations: Good or Bad for Innovation?

You might be wondering: Why should governments get involved in what tech companies put on their phones?

The answer is complicated, so let’s break down why it’s ultimately a good thing for consumers.
The EU’s reasoning is that Apple’s Lightning connector, which is completely proprietary, creates unnecessary waste.

It’s hard to disagree when so many people’s drawers are filled with a slew of different chargers — one for every electronic device lying around the house.

The EU’s point that Apple connectors create unnecessary waste is sound.

Remember Apple’s 30-pin cables for iPads and Samsung’s innumerable proprietary connectors?
By adopting a universal connector, these sort of issues become problems of the past. With more companies switching to renewables and recyclables, it makes sense to reduce unnecessary waste.

Also note the price of plastic packaging pales in comparison to resources going into the production of each new connector. We could all potentially look forward to a future devoid of landfills replete with useless old cables.

Even if the planet’s not on your mind, you’d have to agree there’s nothing more annoying than not being able to use a decade-old device because you can’t find the right charger. With a single power connector, you wouldn’t need to hunt down an Apple charger when you’re over at your parents’ house.

No power adapter? No problem. The ubiquity of USB-C would have the added benefit of allowing your phone to get juiced up directly from any PC.

What’s more, the $20 you’d spend on a spare phone charger — or the $10 you’d use to purchase an extra Lightning cable — is money you could put toward something else.

Unlike Apple’s removal of the 3.5mm headphone jack from their phones, which set a terrible new standard for all other manufacturers to follow, most phone companies have already switched to the USB-C standard — making Apple the only holdout.

With all the positives out of the way, we must address the elephant in the room. Namely that it’s wrong for governments to tell tech companies what they can and cannot do.

Some might argue forcing Apple to get rid of its Lightning connector stifles technological innovation — but the fact remains, Lightning connectors are long overdue for a replacement.

Despite being introduced only two years before the USB-C standard, Lightning’s age is really starting to show. Two years is huge in terms of tech advancement. Lightning’s speeds are roughly 10 times slower than any connection you can get out of a USB-C.

USB-C connectors can carry signals from wires rated for 10 times the speed any Lightning cable can manage, and they’re even future-proofed for the upcoming USB-4 standard. Lightning can only carry a measly 12 watts of electricity at 2.4 amps, compared to USB-C’s native power support, which ranges from 100 watts at 3 amps to 240 watts at 5 amps.

With all that in mind, USB-C is faster, more efficient and much more ubiquitous. Plus, it’s what the industry wants.

The government is merely forcing Apple to get with the times by forcing them to get rid of Lightning — or at least forcing them to accelerate their plans to do so.

If Apple had their way, chances are they’d make yet another proprietary connector. Such standards have enabled electronics manufacturers to create higher-quality products with standardized testing, allowing them to focus on developing innovations that matter, while offering convenience to end-users like you and me.

Without getting too far into the weeds, we should point out that Apple’s entire history — indeed, its entire sense of self-identity — rests almost completely on a blindered belief that it knows what is best for everyone. It believes this regardless of what the people themselves think. If you have some time and want to read a fun biography on its founder. At some point you will read (complimented by the emotion of your choice) how Steve Jobs rather militantly concluded that no reasonable reason exists why anyone would ever need a mouse with more than one button. That may tell you all about Apple that you need to know. … Still, they make very fine and very stylish products. Really pretty, those Apple things.

If you define the problem correctly, you almost have the solution.Steve Jobs

Kalina Ryu

Posted on by Team Penthouse

15 QUESTIONS with Kalina Ryu

When did Kalina Ryu start creating content?

I started creating content in 2013.

What is your favorite part about working in this industry?

My favorite part about working in this industry is all the friends I’ve met along the way.

Throughout your career, what is your favorite scene you have created?

I don’t think I could choose a favorite scene. I’ve been fortunate to work with such talented casts and crews. I wouldn’t want to hurt any feelings. I’ve had so much fun!

Who are three performers you dream of working with?

This is also another difficult question. Three performers I dream of working with are Luna Star, Bruce Venture and Rico Shades.

What song best describes you?

I’m a fan of all genres of music as there is a time and place for almost anything. I really love OutKast. “CPU” by Big Boi goes: “It’s you that’s on my computer screen ’cause it’s you that’s on my mind.” I want to be the girl you’re watching and am looking forward to bringing you new content.

What is your favorite season?

My favorite season is summer. I don’t like being cold. Less clothing and shoes is preferred.

What foreign language would you like to learn?

I speak a little Korean and even less Spanish. I’m embarrassed that I understand more than I am comfortable speaking. I’d love to be fluent in both. After that, probably Japanese and French.

What era would Kalina Ryu choose to live in if she could?

I really appreciate the freedom and modern technological conveniences that we have. I can’t imagine traveling back in time before running water and electricity. I do love the traditional Korean folkwear of the Joseon dynasty. The hanboks are so beautiful.

If you could meet any celebrity, who would you choose?

I’d choose Mila Kunis. She’s super pretty.

If you won the lottery tomorrow, what is the first big purchase you would make?

The first major purchases I would make would be buying a bunch of houses all on the same street for my entire family somewhere tropical.

What is the funniest thing you have ever seen happen in person?

The funniest thing that has ever happened to me is having my connecting flights delayed three times today!

What is a quirk you have that no one knows about?

A quirk that I have that no one knows about? I’m pretty much an open book. Everyone knows how silly I am.

Do you have any hidden talents?

I’m not sure if it’s considered a hidden talent, but I like to paint.

Who is your favorite superhero?

Superman.

What does your perfect day off look like?

A perfect day off for me is a day at the beach with a handsome man.

On the upside, they were able to correctly count to 15, so that deserves some kudos. (We added the pictures.) We’re not sure that group of queries represents the most linear thinking or ends up painting the most rounded picture of Kalina, but you can definitely get personality from the effort. When it all comes down to it, you may be surprised at how much personality matters more than almost anything. Understanding that, you may naturally increase your knowledge of this excellent Kalina Ryu personality on ManyVids. Anything else that happens, well, that will be up to you.