So … Hey Luenell
Long before her breakout role as the “hooker with the heart of gold” in the 2006 comedy Borat, Luenell had established herself as a badass who doesn’t pull punches or take shit from anyone. And when she agreed to pose nude for Penthouse, we knew this funnywoman wasn’t kidding around.
Regardless of age or body type, it takes a uniquely strong person to bare it all in front of a dozen strangers, and Luenell strutted around the photo shoot like a peacock in full bloom. Michelle Obama once said, “History has shown us that courage can be contagious.” We hope that this pictorial serves as an inspiration to all woman to raise their middle finger to any and all who would try to hold them back.
How is it that I have the distinct honor of talking to you in bed, naked, during this historic photo shoot?
You are the luckiest man in Los Angeles, that’s how. You must be living right. I’ve been going through some things in my professional life that are sad to me, the way they cast aside women after a certain age or over a certain weight in Hollywood. If you’re not between 17 and 28 and don’t weigh between 116 and 125 pounds you’re shit. Even though you know better, that can wear on your psyche if you live here. You begin to feel as if you’re not as good, or you’re worthless…. I haven’t felt that way often, but I can tell you if I lived in Georgia I wouldn’t be thinking about having a tummy tuck. I’d just be a fat bitch in Georgia.
“Every woman, in somebody’s eyes, is a supermodel. But the most important person’s eyes… is their own.”
Why do you think that particular body type is what Hollywood continues to push when it’s not relatable to most people?
Designers want to design for certain types of people and the masses that watch TV and movies want to see a certain type of woman. The standard of what a Hollywood type is was set long ago and that is still what it is. You have to look a certain type of way. Although Hollywood stars used to be glamorous, now we have some raggedy-ass stars so that’s changing. Maybe the body issue shit can change, too. Like it or not we live in an obese society, they super-size everything, we eat way too much and we do way too little, but that doesn’t mean you’re worthless, that doesn’t mean that you aren’t sexy, that doesn’t mean that you don’t have hopes and dreams and want to be desired and have dirty, nasty sex and all that stuff. It just means that people have to open their minds more and see the beauty in people and not get sucked into the whirlwind of the bullshit.
Luenell has always been a woman who owns her sexuality and you once said you’re not into “restrictive garments.” You look amazing in every shot. How did you feel getting all dolled up in lingerie for the camera?
I wore all that stuff when I was younger. I wore the corsets, I dressed up for my man, I did all that. But what I found was the real men don’t care anything about that. It’s cool, if you have a video vixen she should look like one, but if you’re in the real world and you’re a real woman, then it’s more than those outfits that is turning a man on about you. Every woman, in somebody’s eyes, is a supermodel. But the most important person’s eyes they need to be a supermodel in is their own. I’m saying wear whatever you’re wearing with confidence, swag. Lift your head up, step high, and be proud of who you are and have fun. You only get one life.
I love that you say, “I don’t have to suck my stomach in, I just let the shit hang.” What message were you trying to send with this shoot?
My goal, first off, was to have more women look at Penthouse than have ever looked at it before by putting something special in that has never been done before. They have never shot an over-50, heavyset black woman. I want to make history in every area of my life. The way I walked around this shoot I never would have thought I’d be so comfortable walking around naked, but I want to tell women to be free. This is me. I’m great and it’s okay that I don’t look like you and we are all amazing and can all hold our heads up and be desired.
Any cold feet as the date of the shoot drew near?
About two days before I got cold feet because I’d never done a shoot like this and I didn’t know what to expect. I didn’t know if someone was going to giggle behind my back because I didn’t know what kind of people I was going to be naked in front of… or the judgment and the backlash that may come to the magazine or myself about how I look (or don’t look), or what I should or should not have done. I had cold feet, but they warmed up very quickly when I looked at the greater good of what is hopefully going to come of this shoot. I just said, “Eff it!” People can go fuck themselves if they feel any type of way about what I’m doing, because I’m a badass.
Social media is a wonderful and awful thing. On one hand, it allows information to be shared quickly while bringing people closer, but it also gives voice to some very ugly, closed-minded people. What has your experience been like as Luenell the celebrity?
I’ve had two social media beefs. It was very unnerving. I spent a whole day blocking people because I want to keep my pages upbeat. I think that my mouth, personality, sexuality, and humor distract people from body-shaming me, but every now and then something gets out that is unflattering, so I’m ready for the backlash. “Why would Penthouse put that old, fat, black woman in this magazine?” Because Penthouse is forward-thinking, Penthouse takes risks, Penthouse is smart, and Penthouse has my back because they know for every person that says something negative there are probably 10,000 people cheering me on and wishing they had the balls to get shot naked. I can say that I have had the same experience that supermodels have… I have been shot by Penthouse! This is historic. I would hate to think that we did all this for nothing. I want to make history with this shoot, at least in my mind. Because in my mind, I will always know that I was taken care of and this wasn’t some janky, pervy shoot. It’s already made history for me. And of all the shots we took, I know we’ll use the best ones… and through the miracle of technology, I’ll look even better.
“People can go fuck themselves if they felt any type of way about what I’m doing.”
That’s always an area of contention on the internet — people over-photoshopping their pictures.
I understand why they do it but I think if you’re photoshopping to present an unrealistic image of yourself — when it’s overexaggerated and ridiculous — that’s when we talk shit. If it’s done to camouflage a few human flaws and accentuate the beauty, then it can be okay. Taking blemishes or a mole off somebody is fine. When they photoshop me they won’t be hiding any poundage, it’s going to be hard to do that, although I begged them to do it.
It’s been a crazy, scary six months for America. A person sits in office who has repeatedly gone on record shaming body types that are different from his preference. He has referred to beautiful women as pigs. Is this photo shoot in any way a fuck-you to him?
Absolutely. The only thing that could have made this photo shoot any better was if I was sitting in the lap of a hot guy in a wheelchair because, you know, he shamed a handicapped person as well — or tried to — which I thought was moronic. Black people have always been put down and taunted, but you really, really hit a new low when you do that openly in the media to a handicapped person. Having a sexy man in a wheelchair would have been the only thing to make this shoot a bigger fuck-you to him. My world doesn’t even deal in the world that Donald Trump lives in. My people and my friends do not even think in any kind of way that his white-privileged, dumb-fuck, cracker-ass believes in. How high do you have to build a wall? Who is going to build that motherfucker? Are you crazy? He wants to use prisoners and release student loans and pay $89 an hour… can you imagine the child who hasn’t had a job for six months and he comes home and tells his mom he got a job building the wall? Get the fuck out of here! But I digress… I don’t think Donald is going to know anything about this Penthouse unless we, the public, make such a fuss about it that it makes worldwide news. Then he will probably invite my fat ass to the White House and then I would tell him, “Fuck-you.”
Would you accept the invitation if only to be able to tell him to fuck off right to his face?
No, I would refuse. He can’t be talked to, and what I have to say to him is not going to change him. I’m not going. I have to live in this community. Are you insane? Hell to the no!
We nearly had our first woman president. It’s 2017. Why do you think so many men are still afraid of strong, powerful women?
I don’t even know that they’re afraid. It’s just that they’re so misogynistic, so chauvinistic, so ego-rot, old-school, and old-world that after letting the black man in — although they had no choice — they could not allow for a double-whammy wham-bam. It was not going to be a black man and then a woman because what’s next? A gay person? A Mexican President of the United States of America? They wanted to shut that down. I mean, you have to have more training to work at Wendy’s than he has to work as the Commander in Chief. He does not realize he’s going to have to make State of the Union addresses. His people backing him up are going to be embarrassed. It’s the big “oops” moment. They didn’t want to let that woman in the White House and now, even the people that voted for him are like, “Oh, damn!”
“If you go on about living your life and don’t obsess over what you can’t change, then you can live a happy life.”
I agree. But I have two small children so I try to find hope wherever I can. Is there anything you can spin positive from this moment in time?
It’s really all in the way you live your life and the people you surround yourself with. I don’t obsess by sitting and watching CNN. I tune out the bombardment of bad news that we get and I surround myself with artistic people. I have a child, I have love in my life. I know the Lord loves me and he shines on me for the blessings and opportunities I’m given every day. I live in a bubble that has nothing to do with Washington. A lot of my friends do that. We have other lives that, no matter who was in the White House, it doesn’t affect us on a daily basis. I think if you go on about living your life and don’t obsess over what you can’t change, then you can live a happy life. You can forget about it. Every now and then you tune in, check it out, you bitch, you moan, you talk to your friends, you rant and rave. Then you have to be able to get back to your real life with your friends and family.
I feel as if you are contributing some much-needed good news with this pictorial.
I hope so. That’s the goal. Being that I do stand-up comedy as well, every day of my life, all I want to do is have fun and make people happy. I’m going to die doing that. They’re going to be like,”That bitch partied ’til the end.” I just want to go to bed at night with a smile on my face.
Will you go to bed tonight with a smile on your face?
This experience was groundbreaking, amazing, hilarious, wonderful, and caring. Everyone on set has been very, very kind. I think I bring the humor to the table that makes everyone feel relaxed, and we all felt like family. We’re all here for a common goal to empower women by making history while making people happy. Some people will be mad, but they’re just jealous. But I think most people who see this will be like, “Go on, girl!”
Now that you have the shared experience with the First Lady of posing nude, do you feel “presidented”? I mean presidential?
She did that when she was 22, young, and stupid. I did this when I was not 22… and old… and stupid. Ha ha! She didn’t get shot for Penthouse, though! Anybody can take naked fucking pictures with their hand on their pussy. So I think I went above the First Lady!
I was hoping that with the uncovering of that pictorial, Melania would use it as a chance to send a sex-positive message and maybe even embrace the ever-growing sex worker industry. I’m not trying to shame her.
Oh, I go there. I have a whole stand-up comedy routine where I shame the shit out of her! In the eight years that Michelle Obama was in the White House we never even saw her in a bathing suit, and I done seen this bitch’s pussy, titties, and her in bed with other women. This is your First Lady. I hope you’re happy. I feel sorry for her. She’s obviously verbally abused. She only signed up to be a kept woman. She didn’t want to be the First Lady of the United States! She just wanted some diamonds in her ear and now she has all the bullshit, boring-ass meetings and dinners with hacks that she’s going to have to attend. She just wanted to be a happy little hooker and get herself an old man with some money. I’m surprised Donald makes the beautiful children that he does with that penis of his. It cannot be bigger than a thimble, and he must have very powerful sperm because I know he ain’t fucking the shit of out of nobody! That’s why Ivana left his ass!
